The question I've been dealing with is just....where's my heart? Where's my heart right now? Do I need a heart check? I mean, obviously I do, because otherwise, I wouldn't be feeling so weird right now. But what have I given my heart to that is preventing me from experiencing God's love, and letting that love be enough for me?
Perhaps it's pride. I want so badly to be in control of my mind, of my heart, and my emotions. Things are fine so long as I'm the one calling the shots, but as soon as it looks like I've relinquished control to someone else, I freak out.
Or maybe it's just my humanity driving me. My wants drown out my needs. But my needs can't be ignored for long. I feel like I just need to be reminded of who I am; where I've come from and where I derive identity from.
So what am I running toward? Or what am I running from?
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