I think I've figured out something about myself. I am happiest when I'm living in the present. That's why throughout my day, I can be so happy and certain of God's love for me.
But then night hits, and I toss and turn as I reflect on my past. I analyze and process everything that happened during the day and find connections to my deeper past to explain my emotional responses. That's when I doubt myself. That's when I'm unsure of God actually living in me, working in me.
Looking toward the future is what inspires me. I can't wait to do all the things I want to do. But the future makes me feel so impatient and almost impotent to do anything but wait for the future to come around.